#14 | A Village To Hold Young Men - Nicky Wilks (Journeymen)
“Boys just need permission to be. They want to be compassionate and to know how to communicate their feelings and to have intimate relationships with people, especially other boys and men.”
My guest today is Nicky Wilks, a good friend and father of 3, who has spent many years working with youth of all ages.
5 years ago, he co-founded Journeymen, an organization dedicated to guiding young men through nature-based rites of passage, and honing their communities to be able to receive them properly afterwards.
In our conversation we touch upon a number of key themes, including: why modern culture is currently failing our youth, why parents aren’t meant to be everything to their kids (and why that’s a good thing), and how we can truly make space for the genius of our boys.
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SHOW NOTES
Introduction to journeymen
Describing his childhood and losing belonging
Identity precedes purpose
The importance of a personal origin story
The need for initiation at the right moment
The quest: overview of the archetypal journey for youth
Crafting a claiming statement
What the culture doesn't see in boys
Boys are struggling with models of healthy masculinity
How can parents understand adolescence in their boys
Parents can’t do everything and that’s a good thing
Rites of passage need to regenerate the village
Youth mirror important feedback to the system through behaviour
The genius of young men
The challenge of youth making porn
How village can hold space for difficult topics
The difference between a push or pull model
Living with youth under coronavirus lockdown
Importance of dinner ritual and facilitated council
